Welcome to the Jungle
May. 7th, 2009 01:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
persona_systemSummary: Sephiroth and Zax have a long walk back to base.
Rating: pg-13 for some language
A/N: Okay, I had an absolute blast working on this. It's unbeta'd.
Damn jungle. I really hate these cleanup missions. The southern end of the Wutai peninsula is one of the hottest and most unpleasant places I've ever been, and that's saying a lot since I'm from sweltering Gongaga.
The Wutai have several forts hidden in these hillsides that we're supposed to infiltrate and eliminate before the month's out. Well, three, to be exact. And so far Seph and I have only taken out one. And that took nearly two weeks of planning and slowly knocking out their forces!
Oh yeah. Seph's here with me. Not that I would ever call him that to his face. It's just... "Sephiroth" is so long and it's a pain in the ass to say when you're breezing through an internal monologue.
Yeah, it's not that I mind being on a mission with ShinRa's greatest SOLDIER, but he's not much of a conversationalist. I'd only met him a few times before we were sent out here together, and I didn't realize how quiet and serious he is. Well, I guess it helps with his job. He's saved my ass a few times since we got out here, but... I just wish he'd loosen up and let me talk to him!
Oh damn, river crossing. Well, more like a very large stream, but I think it's the Tan-Ming River. Okay, so it looks pretty muddy. Okay. Easy does it Zack. Wait, how is Seph already all the way across?! I'm not even down the bank here! It's all slippery and muddy and...
"Woah!" Oh shit. Didn't mean to be so loud. Aww, I'm all wet! Fell right in the goddamn river. Oh, Seph doesn't look too happy. Well, I mean no shit, Fair, you just fell in the river! Woah, bit stronger current than it looked. Ah, and this damn mud. It's like walking on wet ice. Had to deal with a fair bit of that shit when we spent a weekend cleaning up the Genesis forces by the Icicle Lodge.
Oh, he's gonna help me out of here. Bracing himself on a tuft of reeds and grass, must be pretty slippery on that bank.
"Give me your hand." Yes sir! Thank you sir!
All right! Out of the muck!
"Are your feet wet?" Well geez, sir. I just fell in the river! But I'd never be that belligerent with him.
"Yeah, I think so." It's even harder to climb up these muddy banks when you're wet. I'll grab onto Sephiroth's arm. He'll help me up. Ah, dry, solid ground.
Sephiroth's sighing. Must not be very happy. "We can't stop here. The patrols are going to be back around to this area soon. Can they wait until we're back at the base?" He doesn't wait for a reply and starts down the road.
Woah, Mister Never-Talks! Slow down there! You'll use up your daily word allotment! Wait... what's he talking about? Oh shit! That keep your feet dry thing. I wiggle my feet and wince at the feel of sore blisters in soggy socks.
"I guess they'll have to. Can SOLDIERs actually get trench foot?" I'm honestly curious, although it comes out sort of irritated sounding. I've never heard of it once you get your mako ups.
"We lost a few firsts to it during the Mideel skirmishes." Geez, that's not good.
"Geez, that's not good." I throw an arm around Seph's shoulder. I feel him glaring into the side of my head. My shoes look pretty interesting right now. Stupid, Zack. Stupid. Of course Sephiroth doesn't want your hands all over him, especially when I'm all soppy and wet and squelching along. But I don't want to back off now. Grin and bear it. "How far is to the base?"
"Two and a half miles, if that river we just crossed was the Tan-Ming." Guess Seph's just going to live with the personal contact.
Walking in silence. BORING! I don't know what to say to him, though. Kind of awkward to just walk along all draped on him without saying anything, but...
"Fair, is there some reason you're clinging to me?" Well, he doesn't sound angry.
"Nah, sir. Not really." I smile widely at him and try not to laugh at the shocked look he gives me.
"I... see." He sounds off-balance. Wow. That never happens.
"Do you?" I tease. Might as well keep the comradery flowing. That's one thing I miss about being a second. Everyone's super close and friendly. The firsts have to be your commander all the time, so they seem so distant, and that distance seems to carry into their inter-personal relationships.
"Wow, they were right! Your hair really does smell like strawberries and roses and everything!" I exclaim. I've never bothered trying to verify that stupid Silver Elite email, but his hair is right next to my face so it's hard not to notice.
"Who was right?" He sounds curious, not just a polite inquiry to keep the conversation going.
"Oh... uh..." Wow, this is honestly kind of embarrassing to admit, but... "the Silver Elite." There. Didn't have to admit I was in his fanclub.
"I wasn't aware they were giving out information to random SOLDIERs." He sounds a bit annoyed. Doesn't seem to be directed at me, though. Yet.
"They're not just giving out info." Deep breath, Zack. It's not like he's going to chop off your head. "I'm a member."
Sephiroth's stopped and is giving me a very strange look.
"You're in the Silver Elite?"
"Yeah, maybe we should keep walking." Just dismiss it. It's not a big deal.
"You are in the Silver Elite." Still stopped in the road. Let's just drop it, big guy.
"Yes." I try and pull him forward a bit with my arm. Still draped across his shoulders.
"You are in the Silver Elite?" His reaction might actually be kind of humorous if if weren't for the subject matter.
"Yeah," I say, rolling my eyes good-naturedly.
"Why?" At least it's not an annoyed 'why.'
Honesty's the best policy. "I ran into a member on their recruitment day and was invited to join?" That was more of a question than an answer.
"But they're supposed to screen members. Only the most die-hard-"
"What's Sephiroth's sword, what hand does he use, what's his limit break." I just cut him off, whoops.
"And?"
"And what?"
"The answers?"
"Oh... the Masamune, left-handed, Super Nova. Am I right?"
He snorts. "Good job, Fair." We start walking again.
"Say, where do they get all that info about you?" I've been wondering for a while now, ever since they sent out that message about his personal hygiene habits.
He's laughing. He's honestly laughing! Well, I guess it's more of a chuckle, but still! "Me."
It takes a few minutes for that to sink in. I'm sure my face must be pretty strange looking right now. "YOU?!"
"Yes. Me." He's not laughing anymore, but I can feel his smile behind his hair.
"But... You give the Silver Elite their info." I can't quite get my head around this. "YOU."
"Yes."
"But the emails are so ridiculous! I mean, who really cares what kind of shampoo you use?"
"Lovestruck women," he says. "And SOLDIER firsts, apparently." Sweet Ifrit, the world has ended. Sephiroth just made a joke. At my expense, of course.
"Hey, it's not like they gave me a choice to join or not. She just started asking me questions!"
"You had a choice not to read about my hair," he points out. Bastard.
"But it's interesting! Well, not so much about your hair, but some of the other mail they've sent out." Seph's giving me that can-you-hear-what-you're-saying look. "I'm serious! Who doesn't want to learn about SOLDIER's greatest?"
"You could just ask me, rather than getting ridiculous second-hand information about my personal hygiene." Aw man. Putting it like that makes me feel like a dumbass. I tell him so.
"Make me feel like a dumbass..." I mumble.
"You manage to make yourself feel like that without any intervention from me."
"Hey!" I pull away from him and cross my arms, not breaking step.
We fall silent. I know he knows I'm sulking. That was a cheap shot, asshole. We walk for nearly ten minutes before he breaks the silence.
"We should be nearing the base soon, if the PHS is displaying correctly." He taps the small device with a finger a few times. I ignore him. I'm pouting, and I don't care. "Did you hear me, Fair?" He's looking at me now, and I'm glad my hair's blocking his view. "Zack?" Heard you the first time, buddy!
I don't know why I'm so pissed off about this. It's not like he meant it. Geez, I've resorted to acting like a petulant teenager. Well, technically....
"SOLDIER First Class Zack Donovan Fair." He must think I'm just off in my own little world or something. I keep walking, acting like I'm oblivious. "Pay attention, SOLDIER." Whatever, man. I look idly at the trees. "Zack. Zack. Do I have to strip down to my undergarments so you can take some pictures for the SE?"
Wait. What? Oh damn, blew my cover. He doesn't look too happy that I was ignoring him. Well, it was his fault in the first place...
"Were you ignoring me, Fair?" He does not sound happy.
"No, sir." It's not like he can prove it.
He gives me a look. "As I was saying, we'll be nearing the base in about five minutes."
"Oh, that's nice." That sounded a bit dismissive, but hopefully he won't notice. What am I saying, the man notices everything.
He doesn't point it out, and we walk along for a few long moments before he speaks again. Normally I'd be all over this talkative mood of his, but today... Just shut up already!
"Would you like to explain to me why you were ignoring me?" Shit. And he says it so mildly, too. Like he's saying "Would you like to have the Cream of What or the Shinra Surprise for dinner tonight?" or something.
"Well?" Oh, I guess I was supposed to answer that.
"Oh, uh... I was just daydreaming. Yeah. Uh. Daydreaming." Wow, Fair. Smooooth.
He's stopped, and he's giving me that look again. "Really."
"Yeah! I was just thinking about stuff." I smile widely and do my best 'eager puppydog' look.
"Fair." Damn, I don't think he's buying it. And I really don't think he's going to drop it. He looks like some kind of stern father right now, asking where his son was all last night.
I drop my head and look at my feet. I can't help it, I feel like I've disappointed him or something. "Well..."
"Well?"
"I dunno, man! You're just such a hardass all the time, and then you and Angeal and I guess even Genesis are always all..." I flounder for words. I honestly have no idea where I'm going with this. I gesture a bit, helplessly.
"Angeal, Genesis, and I..." he prompts.
"I dunno!" I nearly shout.
"Figure it out, because I'm not going to put up with this... mood you've been in much longer. Your fighting has been sloppy for the past week." Ouch. Well...
"You're so good at everything! And Angeal was always like, "puppy this" and "puppy that," and he even called me that in a letter to his mom, do you have any idea how embarrassing that is, and Lazard was all telling me I couldn't be a hero! And then I see you guys fight and you're all just amazing, and Genesis just looks at me like some upstart kid or something, and you all do! You all just act like I'm some kid and I'll never be a true (I make little quote marks) First. And then," I take a deep breath. I'm raving. "And then you're all always making me feel like a dumbass, with Angeal's dumbapple story and you're always doing the same thing! And..." I trail off.
I don't even know where I was going with that. Sephiroth looks at me coolly for several seconds while I scuff the ground with my toe.
"So, what you are saying is your pride's been bruised because no one takes you seriously." Wow, sum that up nicely. He seems completely nonplussed that I just blew up at him in the middle of the Wutai jungle.
"Uh..." I scratch my head in embarrassment and shame. "Yeah."
"F- Zack. When Angeal went on and on about dreams and pride and honor..." He trails off like he's not quite sure where he was going with that. "When people dismiss you out of hand like you're just some kid, it's because you are just some kid. You might be a SOLDIER First, but you're more of a nobody than many seconds. It has nothing to do with your ability or your personality or how many missions you've completed. It's just how things are. You can't choose to be a hero or a famous SOLDIER, it just happens. Some of Shinra's best men have languished in obscurity, while others rocket to stardom.
"As for me, I can't speak for for Angeal or Genesis, but I certainly don't think of you as just some kid. You're one of the best men I've worked with. In fact, if I were the sentimental type I might go so far as to say that it's an honor to work with you." Sephiroth finishes, totally serious. I know I'm gaping.
"So, uh...." I manage to begin. But I really don't know what to even say to that kind of speech. 'Specially coming from him. I mean, Sephiroth doesn't say shit like that. I manage to dig my balls out of my knees and respond to him. "You, uhh, don't think I'm just a dumb kid, then?" Wow, way to go Fair. Yes. I do believe that was his point.
Sephiroth nods slightly in that odd way of his. Half nodding, half inclining his head to the side in confirmation. That nod that manages to be both endearing and awe inspiring.
I can't help but run my hand through my hair sheepishly and drop my eyes to the ground. "Uhh..." I seem to say that a lot around him. "Thanks." I mean it. "I'm sorry I've been so...." I trail off, looking skyward for inspiration. "So moody."
"That's quite alright." Sephiroth starts walking again and I walk with him without question. "May I suggest in the future that you come to me before your concerns get so out of hand." Heh, word it like that and it almost sounds like he's offering-
I stop dead. Sephiroth casts me a curious glance, but I'm not even registering that right now. Sephiroth just told me to come talk to him. Talk to him. About the stupid little things that might be bothering me. I'm pretty sure that's the Sephiroth equivalent of 'would you like to hang out, have some beers, shoot the shit?'
Sephiroth says something that I think might be my name and I snap out of my daze. "Uhh," I say again, pointlessly, "sure I will."
Sephiroth raises a perfect eyebrow but nods (sort of) again. We start walking again, and I'm smiling.
Rating: pg-13 for some language
A/N: Okay, I had an absolute blast working on this. It's unbeta'd.
Damn jungle. I really hate these cleanup missions. The southern end of the Wutai peninsula is one of the hottest and most unpleasant places I've ever been, and that's saying a lot since I'm from sweltering Gongaga.
The Wutai have several forts hidden in these hillsides that we're supposed to infiltrate and eliminate before the month's out. Well, three, to be exact. And so far Seph and I have only taken out one. And that took nearly two weeks of planning and slowly knocking out their forces!
Oh yeah. Seph's here with me. Not that I would ever call him that to his face. It's just... "Sephiroth" is so long and it's a pain in the ass to say when you're breezing through an internal monologue.
Yeah, it's not that I mind being on a mission with ShinRa's greatest SOLDIER, but he's not much of a conversationalist. I'd only met him a few times before we were sent out here together, and I didn't realize how quiet and serious he is. Well, I guess it helps with his job. He's saved my ass a few times since we got out here, but... I just wish he'd loosen up and let me talk to him!
Oh damn, river crossing. Well, more like a very large stream, but I think it's the Tan-Ming River. Okay, so it looks pretty muddy. Okay. Easy does it Zack. Wait, how is Seph already all the way across?! I'm not even down the bank here! It's all slippery and muddy and...
"Woah!" Oh shit. Didn't mean to be so loud. Aww, I'm all wet! Fell right in the goddamn river. Oh, Seph doesn't look too happy. Well, I mean no shit, Fair, you just fell in the river! Woah, bit stronger current than it looked. Ah, and this damn mud. It's like walking on wet ice. Had to deal with a fair bit of that shit when we spent a weekend cleaning up the Genesis forces by the Icicle Lodge.
Oh, he's gonna help me out of here. Bracing himself on a tuft of reeds and grass, must be pretty slippery on that bank.
"Give me your hand." Yes sir! Thank you sir!
All right! Out of the muck!
"Are your feet wet?" Well geez, sir. I just fell in the river! But I'd never be that belligerent with him.
"Yeah, I think so." It's even harder to climb up these muddy banks when you're wet. I'll grab onto Sephiroth's arm. He'll help me up. Ah, dry, solid ground.
Sephiroth's sighing. Must not be very happy. "We can't stop here. The patrols are going to be back around to this area soon. Can they wait until we're back at the base?" He doesn't wait for a reply and starts down the road.
Woah, Mister Never-Talks! Slow down there! You'll use up your daily word allotment! Wait... what's he talking about? Oh shit! That keep your feet dry thing. I wiggle my feet and wince at the feel of sore blisters in soggy socks.
"I guess they'll have to. Can SOLDIERs actually get trench foot?" I'm honestly curious, although it comes out sort of irritated sounding. I've never heard of it once you get your mako ups.
"We lost a few firsts to it during the Mideel skirmishes." Geez, that's not good.
"Geez, that's not good." I throw an arm around Seph's shoulder. I feel him glaring into the side of my head. My shoes look pretty interesting right now. Stupid, Zack. Stupid. Of course Sephiroth doesn't want your hands all over him, especially when I'm all soppy and wet and squelching along. But I don't want to back off now. Grin and bear it. "How far is to the base?"
"Two and a half miles, if that river we just crossed was the Tan-Ming." Guess Seph's just going to live with the personal contact.
Walking in silence. BORING! I don't know what to say to him, though. Kind of awkward to just walk along all draped on him without saying anything, but...
"Fair, is there some reason you're clinging to me?" Well, he doesn't sound angry.
"Nah, sir. Not really." I smile widely at him and try not to laugh at the shocked look he gives me.
"I... see." He sounds off-balance. Wow. That never happens.
"Do you?" I tease. Might as well keep the comradery flowing. That's one thing I miss about being a second. Everyone's super close and friendly. The firsts have to be your commander all the time, so they seem so distant, and that distance seems to carry into their inter-personal relationships.
"Wow, they were right! Your hair really does smell like strawberries and roses and everything!" I exclaim. I've never bothered trying to verify that stupid Silver Elite email, but his hair is right next to my face so it's hard not to notice.
"Who was right?" He sounds curious, not just a polite inquiry to keep the conversation going.
"Oh... uh..." Wow, this is honestly kind of embarrassing to admit, but... "the Silver Elite." There. Didn't have to admit I was in his fanclub.
"I wasn't aware they were giving out information to random SOLDIERs." He sounds a bit annoyed. Doesn't seem to be directed at me, though. Yet.
"They're not just giving out info." Deep breath, Zack. It's not like he's going to chop off your head. "I'm a member."
Sephiroth's stopped and is giving me a very strange look.
"You're in the Silver Elite?"
"Yeah, maybe we should keep walking." Just dismiss it. It's not a big deal.
"You are in the Silver Elite." Still stopped in the road. Let's just drop it, big guy.
"Yes." I try and pull him forward a bit with my arm. Still draped across his shoulders.
"You are in the Silver Elite?" His reaction might actually be kind of humorous if if weren't for the subject matter.
"Yeah," I say, rolling my eyes good-naturedly.
"Why?" At least it's not an annoyed 'why.'
Honesty's the best policy. "I ran into a member on their recruitment day and was invited to join?" That was more of a question than an answer.
"But they're supposed to screen members. Only the most die-hard-"
"What's Sephiroth's sword, what hand does he use, what's his limit break." I just cut him off, whoops.
"And?"
"And what?"
"The answers?"
"Oh... the Masamune, left-handed, Super Nova. Am I right?"
He snorts. "Good job, Fair." We start walking again.
"Say, where do they get all that info about you?" I've been wondering for a while now, ever since they sent out that message about his personal hygiene habits.
He's laughing. He's honestly laughing! Well, I guess it's more of a chuckle, but still! "Me."
It takes a few minutes for that to sink in. I'm sure my face must be pretty strange looking right now. "YOU?!"
"Yes. Me." He's not laughing anymore, but I can feel his smile behind his hair.
"But... You give the Silver Elite their info." I can't quite get my head around this. "YOU."
"Yes."
"But the emails are so ridiculous! I mean, who really cares what kind of shampoo you use?"
"Lovestruck women," he says. "And SOLDIER firsts, apparently." Sweet Ifrit, the world has ended. Sephiroth just made a joke. At my expense, of course.
"Hey, it's not like they gave me a choice to join or not. She just started asking me questions!"
"You had a choice not to read about my hair," he points out. Bastard.
"But it's interesting! Well, not so much about your hair, but some of the other mail they've sent out." Seph's giving me that can-you-hear-what-you're-saying look. "I'm serious! Who doesn't want to learn about SOLDIER's greatest?"
"You could just ask me, rather than getting ridiculous second-hand information about my personal hygiene." Aw man. Putting it like that makes me feel like a dumbass. I tell him so.
"Make me feel like a dumbass..." I mumble.
"You manage to make yourself feel like that without any intervention from me."
"Hey!" I pull away from him and cross my arms, not breaking step.
We fall silent. I know he knows I'm sulking. That was a cheap shot, asshole. We walk for nearly ten minutes before he breaks the silence.
"We should be nearing the base soon, if the PHS is displaying correctly." He taps the small device with a finger a few times. I ignore him. I'm pouting, and I don't care. "Did you hear me, Fair?" He's looking at me now, and I'm glad my hair's blocking his view. "Zack?" Heard you the first time, buddy!
I don't know why I'm so pissed off about this. It's not like he meant it. Geez, I've resorted to acting like a petulant teenager. Well, technically....
"SOLDIER First Class Zack Donovan Fair." He must think I'm just off in my own little world or something. I keep walking, acting like I'm oblivious. "Pay attention, SOLDIER." Whatever, man. I look idly at the trees. "Zack. Zack. Do I have to strip down to my undergarments so you can take some pictures for the SE?"
Wait. What? Oh damn, blew my cover. He doesn't look too happy that I was ignoring him. Well, it was his fault in the first place...
"Were you ignoring me, Fair?" He does not sound happy.
"No, sir." It's not like he can prove it.
He gives me a look. "As I was saying, we'll be nearing the base in about five minutes."
"Oh, that's nice." That sounded a bit dismissive, but hopefully he won't notice. What am I saying, the man notices everything.
He doesn't point it out, and we walk along for a few long moments before he speaks again. Normally I'd be all over this talkative mood of his, but today... Just shut up already!
"Would you like to explain to me why you were ignoring me?" Shit. And he says it so mildly, too. Like he's saying "Would you like to have the Cream of What or the Shinra Surprise for dinner tonight?" or something.
"Well?" Oh, I guess I was supposed to answer that.
"Oh, uh... I was just daydreaming. Yeah. Uh. Daydreaming." Wow, Fair. Smooooth.
He's stopped, and he's giving me that look again. "Really."
"Yeah! I was just thinking about stuff." I smile widely and do my best 'eager puppydog' look.
"Fair." Damn, I don't think he's buying it. And I really don't think he's going to drop it. He looks like some kind of stern father right now, asking where his son was all last night.
I drop my head and look at my feet. I can't help it, I feel like I've disappointed him or something. "Well..."
"Well?"
"I dunno, man! You're just such a hardass all the time, and then you and Angeal and I guess even Genesis are always all..." I flounder for words. I honestly have no idea where I'm going with this. I gesture a bit, helplessly.
"Angeal, Genesis, and I..." he prompts.
"I dunno!" I nearly shout.
"Figure it out, because I'm not going to put up with this... mood you've been in much longer. Your fighting has been sloppy for the past week." Ouch. Well...
"You're so good at everything! And Angeal was always like, "puppy this" and "puppy that," and he even called me that in a letter to his mom, do you have any idea how embarrassing that is, and Lazard was all telling me I couldn't be a hero! And then I see you guys fight and you're all just amazing, and Genesis just looks at me like some upstart kid or something, and you all do! You all just act like I'm some kid and I'll never be a true (I make little quote marks) First. And then," I take a deep breath. I'm raving. "And then you're all always making me feel like a dumbass, with Angeal's dumbapple story and you're always doing the same thing! And..." I trail off.
I don't even know where I was going with that. Sephiroth looks at me coolly for several seconds while I scuff the ground with my toe.
"So, what you are saying is your pride's been bruised because no one takes you seriously." Wow, sum that up nicely. He seems completely nonplussed that I just blew up at him in the middle of the Wutai jungle.
"Uh..." I scratch my head in embarrassment and shame. "Yeah."
"F- Zack. When Angeal went on and on about dreams and pride and honor..." He trails off like he's not quite sure where he was going with that. "When people dismiss you out of hand like you're just some kid, it's because you are just some kid. You might be a SOLDIER First, but you're more of a nobody than many seconds. It has nothing to do with your ability or your personality or how many missions you've completed. It's just how things are. You can't choose to be a hero or a famous SOLDIER, it just happens. Some of Shinra's best men have languished in obscurity, while others rocket to stardom.
"As for me, I can't speak for for Angeal or Genesis, but I certainly don't think of you as just some kid. You're one of the best men I've worked with. In fact, if I were the sentimental type I might go so far as to say that it's an honor to work with you." Sephiroth finishes, totally serious. I know I'm gaping.
"So, uh...." I manage to begin. But I really don't know what to even say to that kind of speech. 'Specially coming from him. I mean, Sephiroth doesn't say shit like that. I manage to dig my balls out of my knees and respond to him. "You, uhh, don't think I'm just a dumb kid, then?" Wow, way to go Fair. Yes. I do believe that was his point.
Sephiroth nods slightly in that odd way of his. Half nodding, half inclining his head to the side in confirmation. That nod that manages to be both endearing and awe inspiring.
I can't help but run my hand through my hair sheepishly and drop my eyes to the ground. "Uhh..." I seem to say that a lot around him. "Thanks." I mean it. "I'm sorry I've been so...." I trail off, looking skyward for inspiration. "So moody."
"That's quite alright." Sephiroth starts walking again and I walk with him without question. "May I suggest in the future that you come to me before your concerns get so out of hand." Heh, word it like that and it almost sounds like he's offering-
I stop dead. Sephiroth casts me a curious glance, but I'm not even registering that right now. Sephiroth just told me to come talk to him. Talk to him. About the stupid little things that might be bothering me. I'm pretty sure that's the Sephiroth equivalent of 'would you like to hang out, have some beers, shoot the shit?'
Sephiroth says something that I think might be my name and I snap out of my daze. "Uhh," I say again, pointlessly, "sure I will."
Sephiroth raises a perfect eyebrow but nods (sort of) again. We start walking again, and I'm smiling.
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-23 06:34 pm (UTC)I can't keep re-reading, because the more I read, the more I'm cracking up. I see it's no crack fic, or I think it is not, but on the other hand, its light-heartedness and joyful spirit makes me smile. It has, of course, serious places, yet it's the general tone of the fic I like so much.
The not concentrating on the 'arh, mission ahead' aspect of things and instead on the 'dang, mission goal is to not get muddy, and inform Sephiroth of his fanclub' is brilliant. I mean, it's the little joys of the day that are soo mattering. Even in war. Specially in war. So big point plus on that one.
What's next. Yeah. The dialogs. There were dark undertones with nothing explicit.
Maybe the what I view as 'dark' is stemming from Sephiroth knowing Zack[x?] so much better than the guy'd really like, and that provides a space for exploitation.
I really feared that might come up, even in form of verbal fights, but it didn't. There was more so a honest concern for the well being of a fellow poor, confused spiky. I found it worth reading, because it wasn't a pretend-play, more seeming to me as a kind of thing they honestly may start working together on.
After all, it looked like an offer for growth rather than 'you're retarded and I have to teach you'. I liked that idea, to be saying 'ok you MAYBE are retarded, but not in my eyes, and I don't have to teach you how to do things right, but you may wish to learn them from me if you want to'.
Third. Yeah. While I thought at first the tempo of the fic is just way too fast, it didn't continue to give me that impression in the end, so I kept reading and didn't regret it afterwards.
After all, the story narrator/person whose POV it's from is young, full of fun ideas, full of will to explore things. Of course he won't start describing things paragraph per one item, but rather hops to it a bit. Felt believable, or, in tune with his personality. Maybe disturbed my reading the fic, but didn't disturb my believing the character's full fleshed person with their own style, so the tone was okay.
--'Demosthenes'
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-24 05:18 am (UTC)And I agree. I mean, I knew it was gonna be a war fic from the start, but it's like even when you're going through hell, it's still LIFE.
And yeah, I tried to make it really obvious from the dialog that Seph's got more of a clue than Zax (that's weird to say...). I mean, he's the older, more experienced SOLDIER looking after Angeal's puppy, basically.
You mentioned exploitation. I wanted to actually sort of address that in the fic, but I'm just not sure how I'd fit it in. I'd originally intended to make it clear that this Sephiroth was the type of person who, as smart as he is, is so naive that it wouldn't cross his mind. Actually, in that sense I wanted it to be MY Sephiroth, you know? Someone who's brilliant but innocent and totally good. A soldier who certainly is enough of a strategist to take advantage of anyone, but doesn't because honor and a genuine respect for people keeps him from it.
Anyway, I guess it doesn't matter that this fic didn't really get into that much. I mean, it's meant to be a companion fic to some of our other works, so, ya know...
The tempo is really REALLY brisk, and I've tried to slow it down from the original version a bit. It's hard, though, 'cause it's basically my internal monologue, you know? I wanted things to seem like they were happening almost in real-time. I did try to sort of establish a sense of "this is fast, get used to it" in one of the earlier lines... ""Sephiroth" is so long and it's a pain in the ass to say when you're breezing through an internal monologue."
And yeah, it makes the fic a bit hard to read. You really have to pay attention to what he's saying or else you'll miss things. But I'm hoping to flesh it out enough that it still keeps that "blink and you'll miss it" aspect while being a really enjoyable read.
-Zax
(no subject)
Date: 2009-05-26 12:10 pm (UTC)I didn't consider the inner monologue being all that 'fast'. After all, it indicated the person having it is very noticing of things going around him and flexible. I don't see that as an unwanted trait or something that should be kept off. It is one of those things I imagine he might need as a soldier, and certainly may need if he's heading to a jungle. :P
I loved that 'were you ignoring me?' 'no, sir' exchange. It was just hilarious, and I was just thinking how it would *look* like, the facial expressions while saying it, which was making it yet more funny. Sort of wanted that trail of acting continuing, but then, it maybe wouldn't really be in-character for Sephiroth to insist more, so it was 'right' finished at the point it was.
The another thing I loved [hey, there were more things like that! Actually so many I can't list them all so easily in one comment with, I believe, limited character lenght!] was the moment where Zack realizes what Sephiroth is actually saying is an offer for more then casual 'let's spill your heart if the need really arises and it would interfere with your duties', but more of an offer to spend more time together. If it's going to have a sequel [I hope so!], I'd certainly be interested in the continuation of that. Even should that mean 'only' the mentioned hanging out with some beers.
~Locke